Just do a charge back on your credit card. It costs them more than merely cancelling. Take a screenshot of your cancellation attempts to send to your credit card company when you dispute the charges. If everyone does this, eventually they will have to change their behavior.

If they fight the charge back, file a DTPA complaint (varies some from state to state). In Texas you get $11k for every DTPA violation.

Wasn’t there a hack where you just tell them you’re going to prison?

I once had issues with the internet not moving. Our phone and internet is from one provider, and we told them we were moving. Their slogan was basically that they would move everything in one go.

The day came, telephone worked, DSL worked after a call, and everything was fine… until my wife called me at work a few months(!) later that the internet did not work. The usual things did not fix it, so we called the provider.

They told us that we had no DSL at the new location, and as they needed a free DSLAM, they simply unplugged us. Our DSL was still “located” at our old address in their files! So I asked when they will give us our DSL back. They told us they can’t. We should just cancel our old connection, and order a new one at our current location. They would add more capacity in a few months(!) and we could get our internet back then.

Luckily, our company used the same provider with a big contract, so I complained to my sales contact on their side. She promised me to fix things. Two hours later, my wife got a call from the provider: we would get our DSL back at the next opportunity, I.e. the next morning. And we got it back.

I had this problem. I use their online tool to see if I could move my service to the new place, and it said it wasn’t covered. I still had to call them and cancel by phone, wait for them to determine whether or not it was or was not unavailable in that location even though I told them they’re automated system had already confirmed that it was not, and had to sit through there God damn bullshit until I was finally canceled.

Just tried to navigate this recently to move the fiber jack in my home with AT&T. Mentioning it tells me to see the FAQ which leads me in circles to the same effect. Called the support number, got led in circles by the automated support, apparently no one has ever heard of wanting to schedule a service visit if your Internet’s not broken and you’re not trying to set up a new service account. Had to call again and say “representative,” then hang up and do it a second time to finally forward me to a human.

Call you bank/credit card provider, get a human being on the other end, and calmly tell them any further payments to Xfinity are unauthorized/fraud.

Man i had a HELL of a time cancelling my service with Comcast when I moved countries. It was this BS even on the phone with a human. Like “what if we offer you a free TV package for 6 months?”

Man I’m not gonna live in the US just let me go

Weird way of telling your bank to stop all payments.

Just tell them that you are moving to California then they have to give you a way to do it online.

It makes so much more sense once you realize FAQ is pronounced Fuh-Queue.

Xfinity is a curse from hell. Over the years I’ve had to help my elderly aunt with various problems with their account. A couple different things that worked:

1. went into an Xfinity store. This helped for simpler account things. People there were generally cool, it was just a job and I think they knew the whole company was a mess, they’d give me tips on how to get to the right place and solve the problem.

2. convinced the AI bot that it was a problem that it couldn’t solve. Then I got a human in the chat, who could actually help.

3. went to the web-based “help bulletin board” (I found this through the account’s panel) and posted the problem there. There were several unhelpful “community expert” responses but eventually someone who worked there guided me to a web-based chat with their first-line tech support, i.e. so I could give account information. It took them half an hour to reply to anything I said. I explained things VERY CAREFULLY repeating everything we’d established so far (I imagined I was talking to an evil genie) and they eventually gave me a phone number to call, and that person could indeed help me.

From what I have seen online, the correct way to get what you want here is to say “I am going to prison”.

Yeah, chat bots and voice prompt mazes in phones both get an immediate spamming of agent/human/operator until it gives up.

If you didn’t check the FAQ i will remove my upvote.

There’s almost always connect you to a real person if you type something like “talk to a human”