• clearedtoland@lemmy.world
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    10 months ago

    I had the urge while out the other day and had to wipe, like a peasant. Bidets should be a right in the kingdom.

    • space_gecko@lemmy.world
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      10 months ago

      Get a little portable bidet. They’re not ideal, but it sure beats the awful toilet paper in public bathrooms.

      • rockerface 🇺🇦@lemm.ee
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        10 months ago

        Wait, those exist? I might have to look into it, because I can’t install a normal bidet in my apartment (horrible Soviet era piping all over the place)

        • TrickDacy@lemmy.world
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          10 months ago

          Are you saying the water supply to the tank is non standard? That’s the only piece you need to interact with. I’ve yet to see a non standard one

        • powerofm@lemmy.ca
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          10 months ago

          They’re basically a squishy water bottle… Not ideal but might be worth a try?

          • Duranie@literature.cafe
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            10 months ago

            After the birth of my first child I ended up with a hemorrhoid. Truth be told, I was scared shitless to touch anything down there for a couple days after the trauma. They had given me a squishy bottle to rinse myself while everything recovered. Warm water from the tap was heavenly lol.

            • Duranie@literature.cafe
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              10 months ago

              LMAO - I haven’t seen anyone do that before. Everything after the ? is for site tracking info, so you can remove it. There was a post about it sometime in the last couple weeks that gave examples and where to chop it off to not offer more tracking info.

        • LillyPip@lemmy.ca
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          10 months ago

          My $35 bidet is awesome and just diverts water from the tank. It took less than 10 minutes to install: remove seat, place bidet, replace seat, unscrew tank water supply, screw in water splitting hose. You don’t even need to turn off the water, that’s how easy it is. It’s great for renters, too, because you’re not actually making any modifications, and it’s easy to remove with no trace.

          Mine’s a Luxe, but there are several like it in the same price range.

      • tiredofsametab@kbin.social
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        10 months ago

        Tons of places do not have bidets. Hell, numerous places here still have squat toilets. I guess they are common in many tourist spots and stations in bigger cities. I have some occasional digestive issues and tend to know where toilets with washlets are in places I frequent.

  • Stache_@lemmy.ml
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    10 months ago

    Idk about you guys, but I typically don’t watch other people wipe their ass lol

  • MegaUltraChicken@lemmy.world
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    10 months ago

    We had them and then moved to a new place with solid metal lines going to the toilet so I couldn’t reinstall our bidets. I lived in luxury for years only to have it snatched away… Don’t take your bidet for granted people.

    • Passerby6497@lemmy.world
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      10 months ago

      Does your toilet’s water line have connectors on either side, or is it just straight from the wall to the toilet? If the latter, you really need to talk to a plumber, but the former can be solved by just getting a new hose line.

  • rmuk@feddit.uk
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    10 months ago

    I just do that dog thing where I hitch my legs up and use my arms to drag my ass down the hallway runner.

  • SoonaPaana@lemmy.world
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    10 months ago

    Meanwhile 1000 generations of Indians stare at you disgusted by your over reliance on technology.

    • GBU_28@lemm.ee
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      10 months ago

      Sorry what’s the joke here? Big parts of India has issues with sanitation

      • SoonaPaana@lemmy.world
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        10 months ago

        Sorry! Didnt mean to offend! Indians typically use their hands to wipe their butts with water. I think it is cleaner and uses less water relatively. The joke I intended to make was that India has been using water to wash themselves for several years whereas the west needed the invention of a bidet to force the change.

        • ikidd@lemmy.world
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          10 months ago

          Its almost like westerners came up with the germ theory of disease tranamission and adjusted their sanitation methods to prevent it.

          • SoonaPaana@lemmy.world
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            10 months ago

            I agree! But also both Hinduism and Islam had cleanliness rituals baked into their religion. Maybe they were able to notice historically that periodic bathing multiple times a day, helped them to avoid diseases!

            • s_s@lemm.ee
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              10 months ago

              Sino-Asian countries only drink hot drinks for similar reasons…

            • Tartas1995@discuss.tchncs.de
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              10 months ago

              Honestly humans are stupid and it is so interesting what we learned to do for sometimes awful reasons that turned out to be pretty good for us. I mean a lot of medicine was “getting the devil out of you” for a long time and it sometimes happened to work because people would just do random shit.

  • katy ✨@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    10 months ago

    can’t believe david tennant’s husband was the head of one of the largest and most power vampires in the world and david tennant was a vampire expert.

  • Tremble@sh.itjust.works
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    10 months ago

    Funny thing is during the time period of the folks dressed here…. They were dirty nasty and thought taking baths actually made you sick. These guys would have had shit encrusting there assholes in cookie cutter shapes like stars and hearts, and they would have smelled worse than a alcoholic who pissed themselves on the subway.

  • AstralPath@lemmy.ca
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    10 months ago

    “Wipers watching bidet users spray their nasty all over.” Two sides of the same coin if you ask me. The happy medium is the dry wipe followed by the wet wipe then another dry.

    • LillyPip@lemmy.ca
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      10 months ago

      It’s directed water, and goes straight into the bowl. There’s no ‘all over’ unless you’re doing it wrong.

      Also, I hope you’re not flushing those wet wipes. They lie about being biodegradable and cause fatbergs in the sewer that workers have to go down and clear.

    • Stache_@lemmy.ml
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      10 months ago

      Do you reach down and dip the toilet paper into the water to get it wet?

      • AstralPath@lemmy.ca
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        10 months ago

        God no! lmao that’s almost as bad as that podcast guy that admitted he’d catch his own poop and gently drop it in the toilet so it doesn’t splash.

        You can get plumbing-safe wet wipes (baby wipes, basically). They work perfectly well.

        • seathru@lemm.ee
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          10 months ago

          plumbing-safe wet wipes

          That’s usually a lie. But as long as it’s a rent house, it’s fine.

        • LordKitsuna@lemmy.world
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          10 months ago

          There’s no such thing as flushable wet wipes. They might not clog your particular pipes but they do not break down in water. They can’t because then they wouldn’t be able to be wet. They contribute to massive clogs in the sewer systems that people have to go down and break up honestly it should be illegal to sell them

        • veroxii@aussie.zone
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          10 months ago

          There’s no such thing as truly flushable wipes. They’re the bane of plumbers everywhere… Actually more the bane of people having to pay the plumber bill at some stage. A quick google will confirm this.

          Think of it… To be flushable they need to disintegrate in water. But they’re wet wipes so they are always wet… Yet they’re not disintegrating. Wipes which disintegrate in water is just toilet paper.

    • fosho@lemmy.ca
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      10 months ago

      it’s kinda sad how close minded some folks are… so much so that they’ll convince themselves that flushing harmful waste is ok.

  • spaphy@lemmy.ml
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    10 months ago

    Dude wipes coming in clutch. Watch me clean my asshole all day long friends.

    • TrickDacy@lemmy.world
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      10 months ago

      Imagine cramming shit up your asshole then smearing the rest around your bunghole and then being mad that others don’t

    • powerofm@lemmy.ca
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      10 months ago

      Imagine smearing shit all over your ass and feeling clean. If human shit fell on your floor, would you wipe it a few times with dry paper and say “good enough” or bring out a disinfectant spray?

      • seathru@lemm.ee
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        10 months ago

        Neither dry paper nor a stream of warm water is going to clean human shit off. If you aren’t using soap and some sort of scrubbing action, it still smells like shit.

        Pre-shower poopers unite!

    • dream_weasel@sh.itjust.works
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      10 months ago

      Now now… It pisses on your ass, splatters your ballsack, and THEN you smear WET shit all around just like every toilet paper peasant you look down on.

      And I have a bidet… but I don’t strongly prefer it.

      • AstralPath@lemmy.ca
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        10 months ago

        Every bidet I’ve ever used is like this. They’re just as dirty as dry wiping, just in a different way. Like, sure; with a bidet you end up with a cleaner ass after wiping yourself dry, but you can get the same result with a wet wipe but with less collateral spray damage to your cheeks and legs (and balls if you’re a dude).