This is literally my current relationship situation, and hey, I’m happy :3
We both look a bit different on the outside, but on the inside…this is us 🩷

Also I won’t ever stop wearing this really fucking stupid-looking hoodie. You literally can’t make me 😭

  • ZILtoid1991@lemmy.world
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    19 hours ago

    Bi guy here. Why I had to be born in Hungary, where trans rights are scarce, so I can’t get myself a cute trans GF? 😢 Now I have to hunt down the few non-bigoted Hungarian cis women (harder than it sounds like, esp. in more remote areas).

    • Miisha ♀️@lemmy.blahaj.zoneOP
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      14 hours ago

      I hate that I understand that so fucking much…my country is the same. This is a gross generalization, but the men are conservative (and drunk af), the women are conservative, no one even knows what trans people are, everyone’s either knowingly or unknowingly a transphobic prick and I’m depressed from the fact 🥲

      Transphobia, transphobic slurs, bigoted assholes

      The “default” word people use to describe a trans women here is transka. I’m still not quite sure if it’s offensive or a slur, but it sure as shit sounds like a slur. I’ve been called that word before (by my ex-BFF, nonetheless, fuck that guy and his TERF gf) and it definitely didn’t feel good…

      I fucking hate this country. People are like “Oh, I don’t care, I’m tolerant, I don’t care about you I only care about my own life.” and they go from that to “No I’m not gonna use your preferred pronouns, you fucking t*****, you don’t seem like an enough of a woman to me. When I feel that you’re ““female enough””, I’ll try. You’ve only been on hormones for a month anyway, it’s not like you just turned into a woman.”
      These are legitimately words aimed at me. I’ve heard these from him. This was early HRT, a very emotional time. It hurt like hell. And he STILL insisted he wasn’t bigoted, that he only “had a differing opinion”. God, what an asshole.

      • ChaoticNeutralCzech@feddit.org
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        5 hours ago

        everyone

        You haven’t been to the university or the queer meetup, have you? I wish I could convince your BF, brother or someone else to make you go.

          • ChaoticNeutralCzech@feddit.org
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            5 hours ago

            I wish I could come… I know that could convince you but I can’t convince Mom that the university event lasted until 9 PM though…

            You’re self-damaging yourself through negligence and I really wish I could do more about it. I’ve been using a fan for soldering btw, negligent self-harm is bad

            • Miisha ♀️@lemmy.blahaj.zoneOP
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              5 hours ago

              No, sorry. Even that couldn’t convince me. I have a boyfriend, we’re together and I’m keeping my distance from guys I find attractive rn. Thanks for trying anyway 🩷

              • ChaoticNeutralCzech@feddit.org
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                5 hours ago

                They’re not just guys. In fact, women will help you better with fashion, makeup etc. With some, you can talk about hormones, surgeries and other intimate topics! You’ve enjoyed that, haven’t you? I’m pretty sure you’re not the only trans girl in town.

      • Bev's Dad@lemmy.ca
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        1 day ago

        Can you blame us for liking you cuties?

        Gender fuckery of some sort has been a common theme with the people I’ve liked so I’m just glad it works for everyone involved!

        • Miisha ♀️@lemmy.blahaj.zoneOP
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          1 day ago

          “Gender fuckery” I’m dying 😂

          Aww, we like you too 🥺
          Well…a fraction of us like men, it seems lol. But those who do really, really like men. I promise :3

          • Bev's Dad@lemmy.ca
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            1 day ago

            Hehe I really love that term. Sometimes it is the only one that fits lol

            And yeah, I’ve definitely seen both sides of that coin and I don’t take anyone’s feelings personally. I’m just glad that my cuties experience euphoria when I do or say certain things and that I seem to become a safe place for them 🥰

      • birdwing@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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        1 day ago

        I feel it’s because (generally), they like both either way and so their loved one transitioning is like having both cakes and eat it too /lh

        Not in a chaser sense, but a genuine sense of “omg, amazing, i get to enjoy both sides from the same person?” and that for a trans person, being pre-transition, they can feel safer knowing chances are in their favour that the other will like them regardless.

        Like I’ve heard tales w/ cishet and trans relationships where it is more of a coinflip – sometimes they realise they do love them regardless, othertimes they realise, “sorry, i don’t swing that way”. And that is okay too, as long as it ends on good terms. That goes in general with most relationships and ties: whether they strand or not, having good terms is the big part.

        Sure, it can still be the case that it doesn’t work out eventually between bi and trans people in a relationship. But that’s less likely to be due to the transition itself, and that’s kind of relaxing in some way.

        (signed, someone who got adopted by a bi person before)

        • djsoren19@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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          22 hours ago

          yeah it’s unironically this. It doesn’t matter what’s in someone’s pants, I’m down. big “holy shit two cakes?” energy.

        • Miisha ♀️@lemmy.blahaj.zoneOP
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          1 day ago

          I’m gonna be brutally honest…
          I started reading this and got super offended 😂
          But then…you know, that actually makes a lot of sense. I think you’re right.

          My bf once told me “I don’t love you as a boy or a girl…I love you as you” and I’m still not sure how to feel about that…but I’m starting to think it was a compliment ♥️
          This was months ago. I am DENSE, lol

        • Miisha ♀️@lemmy.blahaj.zoneOP
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          1 day ago

          There you are! I was actually really starting to miss you, wondering if I had done something. No, reaching out didn’t occur to me 😭

          Forgive me for this…I somehow didn’t piece together you were bi. It’s good to know, tho! Keep being awesome 🩷

          • WeirdGoesPro@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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            1 day ago

            Sorry, I got crazy busy all of a sudden. I’ve driven about 1200 miles in the last three days for family obligations. I’m almost home though, so I’ll shoot you a message soon. 🙂

            • Miisha ♀️@lemmy.blahaj.zoneOP
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              1 day ago

              No problem at all! Family is important 🩷
              It should be me sending you a message…new account…again😭

              I’m going to sleep right now. Talk to you tomorrow! <3

    • Maelvie@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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      20 hours ago

      The simple explanation is that bi implies a binarity of gender (men/women) but pan applies to everybody regardless of their physical attributes (you’re attracted to a person, whatever physical form they may have)

      • Bev's Dad@lemmy.ca
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        5 hours ago

        This is the correct definition for sure but in my experience soooo many functionally pan people label themselves as bi for one reason or another. Either because that’s the first queer label they’ve found for themselves, because it sounds cuter or because they’d rather not have to explain what pan means for the thousandth time.

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        10 hours ago

        No; it doesn’t. We’ve been saying this since, at least, the 90s:

        Bisexuality is a whole, fluid identity. Do not assume that bisexuality is binary or duogamous in nature: that we have “two” sides or that we must be involved simultaneously with both genders to be fulfilled human beings. In fact, don’t assume that there are only two genders. Do not mistake our fluidity for confusion, irresponsibility, or an inability to commit. Do not equate promiscuity, infidelity, or unsafe sexual behavior with bisexuality. Those are human traits that cross all sexual orientations. Nothing should be assumed about anyone’s sexuality, including your own.

        —The Anything That Moves Manifesto, 1990

        Bisexuals are attracted to people who have the same gender as their own and those who have a gender different from their own; that’s the extent of the two.

        • Maelvie@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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          19 hours ago

          Yep thats the not so simple explanation about bi people, but you should also explain the difference with being pan then.

          Edit: added the second part

          • nforminvasion@lemmy.world
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            4 hours ago

            There is none. Like genuinely, not being facetious or cruel, I just genuinely see no difference whatsoever between every non-biphobic definition of pansexual and bisexual. But hey, call people what they want, as long as it genuinely makes them feel loved, versus them identifying that way to be unique from x group or label.

          • tomenzgg@midwest.social
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            10 hours ago

            I couldn’t say; I don’t identify as pansexual, I’m afraid. All I can speak to definitively is the way that bisexuals define themselves and have defined themselves for decades.

  • Jo Miran@lemmy.mlM
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    1 day ago

    I’m in this picture, and I like it.

    EDIT: Although, I am told that I’m “omni”(?). I’m not good with labels.

    • Miisha ♀️@lemmy.blahaj.zoneOP
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      15 hours ago

      Yeah, lol. Probably still has my blood on it, definitely smells like me cause I don’t wash it…but it’s been with me since my toughest, darkest times. I’m keeping it