Did you read my comment? The bi in bisexual has never referred to two genders; it refers to two sexualities, namely homosexual and heterosexual. Homo meaning same and hetero meaning different. If we consider a set of people with both the same gender as a hypothetical bisexual person (regardless of their gender) and different genders from that same bisexual person, all people are included in that set regardless of their gender.
Importantly, no single word has ever been a full and complete description of any person’s sexual preferences. I’m not saying that all bisexual people are attracted to all people of all genders, but that the word bisexual has no implication of anything less.
The term bisexual is not an exception to the bi - 2, tri - 3, quad - 4, etc linguistic rule, it simply doesn’t refer to the two that you’re assigning it to (genders). Beyond that, I have no idea why you think it’s appropriate to apply a linguistic rule proscriptively to other people’s sexualities.
This kind of confidently incorrect interpretation not only harkens to bisexual erasure (as in ignoring the words and writings of actual bisexual people), it actively harms bisexual people by assigning them with a reinforcing of gender binary that bisexuality has never implied, even linguistically. Try listening to a bisexual person (me, for starters) rather than blaming us for reinforcing a gender binary based on your own misinterpretation.
Also, bisexual is not an old outdated term from “when we considered that there are only two genders” (bisexual erasure much?), it is an inclusive identifier that covers a broad range of sexual preferences.
TLDR: Fuck you, you don’t get to tell me how to refer to my own sexuality.
I was writing a long answer about misinterpretation of heterosexuality and the proven fact 1984-style word play doesn’t erase what is there natively, and also fuck you for throwing slurs around and all that, when the root of the conflict occurred to me. And maybe that’s something that helps settle it.
I treat sexuality as a descriptor, a label, and you treat it as an identity. To me, words should serve as the best available approximation of the experience, which is fluid and complicated and doesn’t fit into narrow boxes anyway; to you, it’s a legacy, a group, a part of who you are (correct me if I’m wrong).
I have no problem switching from heterosexual to bicurious/bisexual, and maybe to pansexual should I meet more nonbinary folks in person. To you, being bisexual is a pillar of who you are, and switching it up is as problematic as switching an engine on the go, and maybe that really shouldn’t be done. You are, indeed, a sole arbiter.
But all these identities grew around words. And words can either bring clarity, or add to the confusion. You yourself claim not all bisexuals are attracted to people of all genders. Wouldn’t it be great if people could properly clarify and make a distinction between being attracted to people of two genders, several of them, and all of them using the terms we already have, and which are widely accepted? This whole “how are bisexuals different from pansexuals” question could be settled overnight! Nothing needs to be invented; all that’s left is to make a good use for the existing vocabulary. And maybe, when new people decide to make these words their identity, there would be waaay less confusion about it.
Did you read my comment? The bi in bisexual has never referred to two genders; it refers to two sexualities, namely homosexual and heterosexual. Homo meaning same and hetero meaning different. If we consider a set of people with both the same gender as a hypothetical bisexual person (regardless of their gender) and different genders from that same bisexual person, all people are included in that set regardless of their gender.
Importantly, no single word has ever been a full and complete description of any person’s sexual preferences. I’m not saying that all bisexual people are attracted to all people of all genders, but that the word bisexual has no implication of anything less.
The term bisexual is not an exception to the bi - 2, tri - 3, quad - 4, etc linguistic rule, it simply doesn’t refer to the two that you’re assigning it to (genders). Beyond that, I have no idea why you think it’s appropriate to apply a linguistic rule proscriptively to other people’s sexualities.
This kind of confidently incorrect interpretation not only harkens to bisexual erasure (as in ignoring the words and writings of actual bisexual people), it actively harms bisexual people by assigning them with a reinforcing of gender binary that bisexuality has never implied, even linguistically. Try listening to a bisexual person (me, for starters) rather than blaming us for reinforcing a gender binary based on your own misinterpretation.
Also, bisexual is not an old outdated term from “when we considered that there are only two genders” (bisexual erasure much?), it is an inclusive identifier that covers a broad range of sexual preferences.
TLDR: Fuck you, you don’t get to tell me how to refer to my own sexuality.
I was writing a long answer about misinterpretation of heterosexuality and the proven fact 1984-style word play doesn’t erase what is there natively, and also fuck you for throwing slurs around and all that, when the root of the conflict occurred to me. And maybe that’s something that helps settle it.
I treat sexuality as a descriptor, a label, and you treat it as an identity. To me, words should serve as the best available approximation of the experience, which is fluid and complicated and doesn’t fit into narrow boxes anyway; to you, it’s a legacy, a group, a part of who you are (correct me if I’m wrong).
I have no problem switching from heterosexual to bicurious/bisexual, and maybe to pansexual should I meet more nonbinary folks in person. To you, being bisexual is a pillar of who you are, and switching it up is as problematic as switching an engine on the go, and maybe that really shouldn’t be done. You are, indeed, a sole arbiter.
But all these identities grew around words. And words can either bring clarity, or add to the confusion. You yourself claim not all bisexuals are attracted to people of all genders. Wouldn’t it be great if people could properly clarify and make a distinction between being attracted to people of two genders, several of them, and all of them using the terms we already have, and which are widely accepted? This whole “how are bisexuals different from pansexuals” question could be settled overnight! Nothing needs to be invented; all that’s left is to make a good use for the existing vocabulary. And maybe, when new people decide to make these words their identity, there would be waaay less confusion about it.
How would that settle us?
I really appreciate your eloquent and expressive defense of bisexual people in this thread. You’ve got a way with words :)
That’s very kind, thank you!