ALQ

MTG is the first person I’d zap if I had a space laser, so she’s real lucky she’s just an idiot.

Man…you know, I think most of us Jews would brag if this were true. I know I, for sure, would.

I’ve enjoyed reporting their emails as spam. It’s the last “fuck you” I can give them without just ignoring them completely.

How dare you leave out Dolly Parton.

I’ve not heard this one before!* I like it!

*I know, dad jokers; I still haven’t “heard” it, just read it.

These are, indeed, the most useful mooseful states.

My favorite is the people who’ve said, on camera, ‘Where was Obama on 9/11? Why wasn’t he in the White House doing anything?’

Modern US conservatives are a special breed of stubborn stupidity.

Oh, I don’t disagree that people can use their iPhones for a long time. (I used to be an iPhone user, too, but prefer android.) I was just comparing my family’s use (all are iPhone users - some rabidly so) and they’re constantly talking to me about issues with battery, charging, what have you, and seem to get a new phone every two years at minimum.

My phone feels loved. And is still, unlike all apple devices my family’s used, fully functional and not in need of replacement.

Sent from my OnePlus 7 Pro