“Please submit your butthole print for identity verification.” -Coming to a website near you!

It’s funny (sad) when the data they want to collect to verify your identity does absolutely nothing to verify your identity. “Hey, we know you’ve used this service before, but we now require your phone number to make sure it’s actually you. You’ve never given us your phone number and we’ll accept any number you are willing to give us as long as you type in the 6-digit code we are going to send you. Because that’s how we make sure it’s really you.”

At least tell me it’s to “increase account security” because that’d be a more believable lie. But even then, randomly asking for a phone number years after creating an account?

Here, we’ve settled a class action lawsuit on your behalf. We determined your data was worth $0.47, enjoy your check!

… Yes our entire business model is selling your data, and our valuation is $5.1 trillion, what’s your point?

In a funny twist of events this makes the internet more anonymous. Since anyone could be you and you could be anyone

Imma about to have so many dick picks thinking they are face pick.