Well the cement shoes thing works until the body decays enough that the ligaments won’t hold the body onto the legs anymore and then bits start to float off. That’s assuming that the fish and crabs and such don’t eat all the flesh first, but then the bones are free to wash up anywhere…
The 50 gallon drum works, it’ll stay at the bottom of whatever forever, but if it does get found the authorities can just chip away the cement and see a nicely preserved body, kinda like those kids archeology toys where they put plastic dinosaur bones inside a plaster rock for kids to ‘discover’
No, the best way is a pig farm. You got to starve the pigs for a few days, then the sight of a chopped-up body will look like curry to a pisshead. You gotta shave the heads of your victims, and pull the teeth out for the sake of the piggies’ digestion. You could do this afterwards, of course, but you don’t want to go sievin’ through pig shit, now do you? They will go through bone like butter. You need at least sixteen pigs to finish the job in one sitting, so be wary of any man who keeps a pig farm. They will go through a body that weighs 200 pounds in about eight minutes. That means that a single pig can consume two pounds of uncooked flesh every minute. Hence the expression, “as greedy as a pig”.
Well the cement shoes thing works until the body decays enough that the ligaments won’t hold the body onto the legs anymore and then bits start to float off. That’s assuming that the fish and crabs and such don’t eat all the flesh first, but then the bones are free to wash up anywhere…
The 50 gallon drum works, it’ll stay at the bottom of whatever forever, but if it does get found the authorities can just chip away the cement and see a nicely preserved body, kinda like those kids archeology toys where they put plastic dinosaur bones inside a plaster rock for kids to ‘discover’
No, the best way is a pig farm. You got to starve the pigs for a few days, then the sight of a chopped-up body will look like curry to a pisshead. You gotta shave the heads of your victims, and pull the teeth out for the sake of the piggies’ digestion. You could do this afterwards, of course, but you don’t want to go sievin’ through pig shit, now do you? They will go through bone like butter. You need at least sixteen pigs to finish the job in one sitting, so be wary of any man who keeps a pig farm. They will go through a body that weighs 200 pounds in about eight minutes. That means that a single pig can consume two pounds of uncooked flesh every minute. Hence the expression, “as greedy as a pig”.
Smooth transition to Snatch quote right there. Guy Ritchie loves his monologues.
You don’t even need to starve them. A pig farmer had a medical emergency while tending to his pigs and they ate him.