In Brazil, “café da manhã” (morning coffee) is the term for breakfast, but it’s often shortened to just “café.”
There was a mobile blood donation set up during Covid and I asked the group chat if it was okay to have coffee before donating, and the response was, “Yes, you should definitely be well-fed before donating blood.”
Yeah once a date invited me up for coffee and I was enjoying my time with her and thought another 15 minutes or so of conversation would be nice, but then it was suddenly like she forgot she invited me in or something because she just started getting ready for bed instead of making any coffee! I just politely said I needed to get going so she didn’t feel embarrassed about forgetting she had invited me for coffee, though I think I failed because she did seem a bit upset.
So I tried to be considerate and go through a coffee shop drivethru after the next couple of dates. Even then, she offered coffee the first time and I pointed at my cup and said I’m fine, though that seemed to make her feel even more embarrassed as she looked like she was about to cry after that.
Then the next time she said, “I think we’ve been having a miscommunication when I’ve been inviting you up for coffee, I didn’t really mean coffee, but I was being a bit immature and dancing around what I really wanted and then getting my feelings hurt when you didn’t get the message. So I’ll just say what I mean this time. Would you like to come up and have sex with me?”
I informed her that’s where babies come from and she already knew and still wanted it. Then she was trying to say something about being on a pill and I noped out of there. I am not interested in a relationship where my partner likes to get high on pills and have babies. That just seems irresponsible to me.
As a coffee drinker, if I was invited for some coffee and did not in fact get any coffee I’d be both a little confused and a little annoyed.
In Brazil, “café da manhã” (morning coffee) is the term for breakfast, but it’s often shortened to just “café.”
There was a mobile blood donation set up during Covid and I asked the group chat if it was okay to have coffee before donating, and the response was, “Yes, you should definitely be well-fed before donating blood.”
That’s pretty good!
Is the context where if you had said can i drink coffee before, it would have been less ambiguous?
Yeah once a date invited me up for coffee and I was enjoying my time with her and thought another 15 minutes or so of conversation would be nice, but then it was suddenly like she forgot she invited me in or something because she just started getting ready for bed instead of making any coffee! I just politely said I needed to get going so she didn’t feel embarrassed about forgetting she had invited me for coffee, though I think I failed because she did seem a bit upset.
So I tried to be considerate and go through a coffee shop drivethru after the next couple of dates. Even then, she offered coffee the first time and I pointed at my cup and said I’m fine, though that seemed to make her feel even more embarrassed as she looked like she was about to cry after that.
Then the next time she said, “I think we’ve been having a miscommunication when I’ve been inviting you up for coffee, I didn’t really mean coffee, but I was being a bit immature and dancing around what I really wanted and then getting my feelings hurt when you didn’t get the message. So I’ll just say what I mean this time. Would you like to come up and have sex with me?”
I informed her that’s where babies come from and she already knew and still wanted it. Then she was trying to say something about being on a pill and I noped out of there. I am not interested in a relationship where my partner likes to get high on pills and have babies. That just seems irresponsible to me.
You put in a lot of effort on this joke so I’ll give an upvote and this comment