we had a (creative) writing workshop once where they said “write the worst possible dialogue you can!” with the idea that then we would read them back, and it’d be stuff like “I love you! I’d die for you!” “But you killed for me - that’s horrible!” etc and they’d point out it wasn’t actually that bad with a few tweaks and a good performance.

I kinda saw that coming so I wrote stuff like,

“Zbijgl, my old fart, my favmamort n n n n number is 183442356742255214676213566873225566333543”

“But my cat food is singing, it goes anganganganganganganganganganga”

and they were forced to concede that yes, it is possible to write truly bad dialogue.

Wdym its the best script. No dependencies, zero maintenance cost, extremely small attack surface.

“The best code is no code” I say to myself before I take the fifth toilet break of my workday

my second worst script so far is probably the one i had to slow down in an attempt to not crash a hospital.